Thus far we have been talking about how to make our husbands happy. But in this entry, I want to focus on how to fulfill our desires in our marriages, from the small stuff like wanting a cup of tea at night to the big stuff like wanting to go back to school or starting a new career.

There is a very important factor that every wife must know, and that is that our husbands want us to be happy! Yes that’s right. When it comes down to it, every husband wants to be your knight in shining armor.

A man feels success according to how happy his wife is. You know the saying, “happy wife, happy life.”

But in order to get what we want we have to realize that most men need to be approached in a particular way. Men deal in black and white remember, so the simpler you make your requests the better.

A purely expressed desire is very different from a demand or a vague request. Your husband will jump at the chance to make you happy, you’ll see.

Laura recommends using these four statements to express your desires:
1. “I want…”
2. “I don’t want…”
3. “It would be nice if…”
4. “I would love …”

Then state what you want. Of course, you must know what you want before doing this, ladies. So make sure that you know your desires before trying to express them to anyone else.

Also, she says that we should focus on the end result, not how it happens. Remember, you can ask a man to do something, but never tell him how to go about doing it.

Here is a list of how NOT to express your desires:
1. Don’t ask him to do things by saying, “Why don’t you…” or “Can you…”
2. Don’t expect anything without expressing anything. He's not a mind reader.
3. Don’t say, “We need…”
4. Don’t ask him if he wants what you want: "Don't you want some tea right now?"
5. Don’t give a lengthy explanation: “I want…Because…”
6. Don’t make him guess what you want. Again, he’s not a mind reader.
7. Don’t tell him how to fulfill your desire.

Things that a wife should never ask for, however, are: affection, time and attention. These things should come naturally if you are using the right tactics. Be the “honey” and he will want to give you those three things.

Try this: Try using the above four statements to express your desires in the next couple days. Let’s say you are both sitting on the couch at night and you want to drink a cup of tea. Just say, “I would love a cup of tea,” and see his reaction.

Remember, I repeat, a purely expressed desire is very different from a demand or a vague request. Your husband will jump at the chance to make you happy, you’ll see.